Most people seem to think that the alternative to success is failure. They also seem to think that the alternative to failure is success. It’s not; in both cases, it is mediocrity. For whatever reason, most people in the West prefer the option of not being poor, but not rich either. They want to be in the middle. It is not a coincidence that a recent poll found that the great mass of men and women in Britain like to describe themselves as “middle class”. These days there are few people at the bottom. There are also few people at the top, the real top. Most of the population has decided to drift, perhaps thinking that there is safety in being in the crowd.
This is a valuable lesson. It means that if you are one of those people who shop for ‘Self-Improvement’, investing in books, tapes, and courses, you must realize that if you start moving up, it is highly unlikely that you will make it to the top. On the contrary, you will reach the middle class, or even the upper middle class, and you will find that you are happy to be there. You will stop and delight in the company you find. That will be enough, you will tell yourself, and rest contentedly. After all, most people have already done it.
How do you get there? The formula for that is the same as always. The fastest way is internal dialogue. Make a promise to start with a 21-day program. You will start a new habit and follow it for at least 21 days. Then set aside five minutes at the beginning and end of each day, perhaps when you are in bed. Relax completely and start talking to yourself; say exactly what you want. There are two things to remember: one, be precise, but not repetitive. There is no benefit in saying, ‘I want to be rich’ over and over again. Talk about the amount of income you need; how much I save; what size of house; what vacation are you going to; what kind of car. Also, follow the other 3 ‘P’, (in addition to Precise): be Positive; Personal; and present tense. Say, ‘I am rich’, as if it is already happening. Say: ‘I am rich’, not ‘My family is well off’, or something vague. Do it all about yourself. Lastly, say only the things you want, not the things you don’t want. Say: “I am healthy, without addictions”, not “I have stopped smoking and drinking.” The four ‘Ps’ are all you need, on the plus side.
Unfortunately, most people forget that there is also a downside. People are more complicated than we like to pretend. You say: ‘I want to be rich’, but inside you there may be a little voice that says: ‘That is dangerous, someone can steal all my money’. Now, ‘You don’t deserve that, you phony.’ It may not be that precise and sometimes all we feel is a little uneasiness. Face it: bring it to the surface. Are you uncomfortable about something you just said? What was it? Was it, ‘I want to be rich’? Is that a contradiction of something you heard or something they told you? Maybe your parents told you that you would always be a failure, or someone you respect once said something like, “You can’t be rich and happy.” You must address this negative thought. Don’t just try to bury it, or hope it will go away. Bring it to your consciousness and discuss it with yourself; Hopefully, you will find that all your doubts and fears are troubling, but illogical and unfounded. Question those assumptions and sayings of the past and you will disarm them. Over time, perhaps within 21 days, they will lose their power, as the positive things you are feeding into your subconscious get stronger.
That is something that is easy to forget. Many people do the right thing and start the 21-day program because they want a real change in their lives, but when they start to have doubts and feel the fears rise, they stop immediately or find that they don’t know how to do it. cope with negative feelings and give up then. The best way to deal with bad childhood experiences and negative parental opinions is in the same way that you deal with any emotional trauma, you follow the Callaghan method or ‘tapping’ as it is sometimes known. Gently tap an acupressure point like the cheekbone or under the armpit with your fingers, and the bad feelings evaporate. Find a Roger Callaghan book and read more.
But here’s a new thought: be honest with yourself. Maybe ‘I want to be rich’ was something aggressive parents instilled in you. You may not believe in such “positive” things either. After all, if most of your compatriots just want to be ‘Medium’, why would you argue? I feel like that explains a lot of things: I’m used to meeting people who say, ‘I want to be rich,’ but then when you challenge them to meet (or do any work), they come back with a ‘Wednesday? I meet the boys on Wednesday night ‘, and other excuses. Maybe, I’ve been thinking, they don’t want those heights enough. No, maybe they won’t, just like the other millions, who just want to be middle class and be comfortable. It’s like putting your house thermostat in the middle, right? You don’t want to be too low, either too cold, or too lean, but you also don’t want to set it too high, whether it’s too hot, or rich. But of course there is nothing wrong with that either. Self-talk will provide you with all the things you want and all the things you can handle. If it’s really not much, well that’s fine: be honest with yourself and admit that your ambitions are pretty low. Self-improvement should be about getting what we want and, if it’s a small amount, great. The rest of the world will thank us for our frugality.