Some experts argue that you should never text your ex… period. Others argue that texting is one of the most intimate, private, and personal forms of communication available to us today, and can do everything from heal old wounds to heighten passion, romance, and desire. When it comes to sexual texting and turning your ex on with texting, the debate gets even hotter.
Sex is a big part of relationships and creating sexual tension and feelings of arousal in your ex is entirely possible with text messages. People say things over text that they would never say face to face. People also tend to respond to text messages in a way that they would never respond if you told them the same thing directly.
When done correctly, you can use texting to get past your ex’s rational mind and connect with them on a much more primal level. You can make your ex hot. And as Michael Fiore points out in his e-book, Text Your Ex Back, “It’s a simple fact of life that people do NOT think rationally when they’re ‘excited’.”
Now, before you get too excited about the possibilities, sexting your ex should be done with caution. This is not something you want to send your ex right after a breakup. That’s a good way to end up back in the doghouse.
These kinds of texts come into play much later, once you’ve built a positive relationship again and are on friendly terms. Only then should you try to arouse your ex through text messages and make them yearn to reconnect with you on a sensual and sexual level.
You should also approach these texts differently depending on whether you are a man or a woman. If you are a woman trying to win your man back, then you want to use sexual texting to tease and arouse your man without having to go “all the way” through texting or otherwise. Let him be a part of “the chase” as this will keep him interested and wanting more from you.
If you are a man trying to win your woman back, you should start small and work your way up from there. You’ll want to use very detailed and descriptive language to build anticipation by first turning on your ex’s mind.
Unlike men, who are largely visual creatures, women tend to respond to stories and language. Appealing to her mind is the way to get her body to follow.