When you want a happy marriage, you need to find what binds the two of you together, like glue! This is the kind of advice that has been passed down through the ages and when it’s something that works, it’s worth considering.
Each couple experiences a unique relationship as no two people are the same. The attraction between you, your shared life together, and everything that goes into making up your relationship is what will keep you together. But this is not all that strengthens your marriage. You can’t afford to get complacent and think that now that you’re married you don’t need to try since you’re together for life, end of story. Making a happy marriage, having a happy marriage requires effort, time and commitment; it is not something that grows by itself. And as with anything that requires care and attention, there are necessary steps to make it happen.
Many people mistakenly think that getting married means you don’t need to ‘date’ anymore, that’s wrong! With the stress and strains of a busy life at home and work, dating is even more critical than ever. Both parties need to get out of their routines to relax and reconnect with each other and remember their love for each other. They need time to play and temporarily put responsibilities aside and recharge their marriage/love battery. You can’t run continuously on a finite ‘gas tank’, eventually it runs out and you have to refuel. You can’t run on empty all the time and not take some damage!
Some people think that they should put their children and others first, but the most important thing in a child’s life is, above all, that their parents love each other. That is where the safety of a child lies. They need to see their mom and dad loving each other and taking time to be together, as well as taking care of them. They need to see their parents model caring for each other and their relationship so that they, too, can have a happy and healthy marriage as adults.
Communication is another area where two people can stick together or get stuck. Each party should feel that her lover supports them and even if she disagrees, she will support the other with love and respect. Learn to actively listen to each other; No one can be paid a higher compliment than to really listen and try to understand what the other is saying. Good listening skills are something anyone can develop and it is wise to note that God gave us two ears and eyes but only one mouth so there must be something to that. Developing your own couple language and understanding each other is the way to unite a happy marriage.
Before I mention about dating, well, if a couple rarely spends time together, they will loosen the ties between them to the point of drifting away from each other until they are far apart. So spend time together and don’t watch TV but actively reconnect with each other on a regular basis. If you must, make a date with each other and see it as one that you have to pay a lot of money to see this person, because in truth it is the most valuable time you can spend with anyone. That is, if your marriage and your partner are your number one priority!
And what about love? You know, the physical type…
After being together for a few years, the desire to be intimate most of the time goes away, but the attraction between you shouldn’t. You may need to try a little harder and schedule romantic dates and even a weekend getaway or two every year, but do it. The more you have sex and release those feel-good hormones, the more you’ll want to do it. This is a time when you can have fun and explore each other. It’s a play time that’s unique to just the two of you, it’s a part of you that you don’t share with anyone else, so enjoy this special part of your relationship together. Do not neglect it and you will have a little more glue to join when you want a happy marriage.
At the time when you were looking for your perfect partner, you may have thought that you would never find it, but finding it was easy compared to maintaining a happy and healthy relationship. However, do not rely on her wedding vows to keep your marriage, you must actively work on it little by little, day by day. If you want a happy marriage, you need to care for it like you would a beautiful flower garden: regularly, and with the right ingredients at the right times.