Anyone who has read my articles and books knows that I am the last person to encourage someone to try to win back the love of an ex who is in a relationship they have always wanted (and never had with you) and is happy and fulfilled in that relationship. relationship. It’s a painful losing battle from the start, for everyone involved.
But what if your ex isn’t in that kind of relationship, he or she may be seeing someone new but is “loosely” attached? Does it make sense to wait 3-6 months before trying to get her ex back due to stupidity? “No contact” rule?
In today’s fast-paced, information-packed society, memories fade far too quickly for so many people…
Every once in a while, your ex will hear something… see something… or something happen that reminds him of you, but as those memories get further and further away over time, they tend to fade, to become distorted. or even die, are buried and forgotten. And they seem to fade even faster when there’s someone else in your ex’s life creating new memories to replace yours.
Before the good memories fade…
And before you rush to get your ex back because you think they’ll forget you, here’s a reality check: Your ex broke up with you for a reason.
I have said this in many of my articles, there is one thing that is common to all human beings of all races, cultures, origins and ages, and that is that people fall in love for many reasons, even with someone who is intelligent. , beautiful, nice, affectionate, rich, charismatic, successful, good friend, etc. but that is NOT what makes them want to stay in a relationship. People stay in a relationship because of how THEY FEEL ABOUT THEMSELVES WHEN THEY ARE WITH ANOTHER PERSON.
It all comes down to emotions and feelings, and memories have big emotions attached to them. Let me put it another way: Memories are “traces” of strong feelings and emotions. Those “footprints” in the shallow sand at the seashore fade faster with just a bit of wind; those “footprints” in the soft lava of a melt of pure love solidify into footprints in a rock and can last a lifetime; but those “footprints” in the thick mud in the icy caves of the heart are the hardest to see, and often the hardest to forget.
For example, if the memory of you makes your ex angry about something you said or did; or if your memory brings with it a feeling of inadequacy because you are too critical and demanding; or if the memory of you makes your ex feel stressed because you are needy, jealous, or controlling, every time your ex thinks of you, the feelings associated with that memory come up.
It is these associations that make someone who may still have very strong feelings for you reluctant and even unwilling to be in a relationship with you again.
Isn’t it time to renew your relationship with your ex?
Note that the word here is “re-new” not to fix or repair. It’s much harder to fix or repair a broken relationship because that means trying to erase the bad memories that tend to stick around much longer than the good ones. And there’s no guarantee that a band-aid solution will stick.
Renew (reboot, revive, regenerate, revitalize, rejuvenate, refresh, recharge, etc.) on the other hand has an element of something fresh, something extra, something different, or something updated, and that’s exactly what that other “new” person he is offering to his ex.
You can’t compete with “new” unless you’re offering something “new” yourself. That means it all depends on how quickly you can become a “new” person and compete from a place of personal strength, confidence, and self-love. There is no way around it, YOU HAVE TO CHANGE TO A BETTER YOU to attract your ex back. Most people are so afraid of change (even when deep down that’s what they want), and it keeps them in their misery. Fear and love cannot share the same heart.
It’s not enough to learn from bad experiences, it’s crucial that you know how to create new positive memories that will make your ex FEEL GOOD about himself when he’s with you and in turn make him or her want to get back into the relationship. and stay in it.
The longer you wait, the more memories your ex will make with someone else, and the harder it will be for you to get back together.
If you really want to get your ex back, you can check out my eBook: Dating Your Ex: What You Can Do Tonight, Tomorrow, And The Next Day To Get Your Ex Back.