If you find yourself wondering, because I’m always tired, the answer could lie within your own personality. There is a difference between gently helping where you are needed and being obsessed with pleasing people. People-pleasing behaviors can make you tired to the point where you can’t please anyone. Here are the traits of a person who likes people and what to do if your help has crossed the line of liking unhealthy people.
Traits of a complacent person?
People who please are more than kind souls who occasionally act helpful towards others. If you are wondering because I’m always tired And by feeling an obsessive need to continually help others, your helpful nature may be crossing the line into pleasing dangerous people. Here are some traits of a people-pleaser:
- Organized
- Well liked
- Appeasing, they tend to give in
- Friendly
- Gregarious
- Helpful and supportive
- Feel the need to keep it all “together”
- Encouraging
- Fun, feels the need to be fun all the time.
- Go together with the others
- Creative, talented, capable
- Socially popular
- Accept delegation: sometimes you can’t say no
- Accused of “always smiling”
- Generous
- Cooperative
- Caring for the welfare of others
- People Mixers
- Assets in conversation
All of these traits sound like good traits, right? Who wouldn’t want to be liked or considered an encouraging and understanding friend? These traits in and of themselves are not dangerous, but it is the feelings behind these traits that identify whether a helpful person has turned into an obsessive complacent.
The emotional truth behind a personality that people like
People’s pleasant behaviors are often rooted in emotional problems that are symptoms of deep insecurities. These people have an obsessive need to please others. They fear losing their personal identity, friends, popularity, or approval. They become obsessed with disappointing family or friends and often feel inferior to others. People who please fear not doing the best they can. They are disappointed when they let another person down and deny their insecurity.
At the same time, people who please people often feel slighted and treated like victims or doormats. They rarely see how their feelings can be self-inflicting. They have “martyr syndrome,” so to speak, which is a desire to play the martyr, take one for the team, even though they are tired of doing it and feel resentful.
What is most important to note about the personality that people like is that things are not always as they seem with this person. They worry that they will find out that they are not as good as they seem and, in fact, often are not. (Who is perfect, after all?) Although they seem neat and organized, they are usually disorganized behind the scenes. Although they seem to have it all together, they are often frazzled, tired, and peel off the pressure when no one is looking. Only those closest to them see the truth.
When feeling tired is the result of pleasing people
Feeling tired It’s probably the understatement of the century for a people-pleaser who’s absolutely at his wits until the end of exhaustion. You feel tired because you are tired, you are absolutely exhausted, and you cannot keep all the balls in the air any longer. Your obsessive need to make people happy is not a good quality, but it has become a source of self-pity, depression and even low self-esteem when you do not feel validated by what you do and tiredness. You are in a chronic state of feeling underappreciated.
People who are coping with this emotional disability experience burnout and lack the ability to maintain healthy relationships with family and friends. They are immobilized by irrational beliefs and fear that they are not achieving enough to make others happy. They often feel that people are not happy with them, reading little things that people say and hearing a statement worse than what was actually said. Criticism of a complacent person is like a stab to the heart.
These people also cannot trust the sincerity of others when they hear a compliment. They often ignore compliments as a sign of false humility. They begin to lose their own personal identity, replacing it with the identity of mom, wife, father, husband, colleague, vice president, etc., etc. At some point, the person who was once intrepid to make decisions is immobilized by the pleasant traits of the previous people, loses his ability to make decisions and cannot even relax.
Overcoming people’s liking is a long-term strategy for dealing with tiredness. One of the best ways to begin to overcome fatigue, depression, and martyr syndrome is to do something for yourself. The ideal answer is to start living a healthier life; adding physical activity and a nutritionally balanced meal plan to your day is something you can do for yourself. Also, consider herbal supplements that are carefully created to help you overcome fatigue and live a healthier life.
How to turn people’s liking into something positive
If you are tired of feeling tired all the time and want to make a change, the answer is not to simply stop doing things for people. Becoming a cold person who doesn’t care about others won’t make you feel better at all. Instead, turn some of the negative things your people like into helpful and positive attributes by following a few simple tips.
1) Instead of feeling self-deprecating, start by accepting your personal strengths and attributes. It’s okay to know what you’re good at and feel secure about those things within yourself, without the need for constant validation.
2) If you find yourself addicted to approval and afraid of being rejected, try increasing your habits of affirmation and positive self-approval. Accept your own worth, regardless of what others feel or think of you. Try not to seek approval on things like what you do and what you wear, but instead make decisions based on your own strengths, the ones you know you have.
3) Instead of stepping up to be the martyr, choose to stop putting yourself in situations where your own needs are ignored. It is okay to protect your rights. Choose not to be a victim of others. Say yes when you want and have time to do it, not all the time.
4) Recognize that you are a success, no matter how you perform at a specific task. Your self-esteem does not depend on how well you do or on achievement. If it fails, just turn the failures into a growth opportunity for next time.
5) Stop being so hard on yourself! Self-punishing behavior, whether physical or emotional, is quite debilitating in the long run. Instead, try to relax, have fun, play, and enjoy life. Everyone is wrong sometimes, and the world won’t end if you do it too.
If your fatigue is related to people’s liking, start living a healthier lifestyle inside and out today. Take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Protect your time and respect your own worth.