Our “Youth Inspiration Programs” began about 9 years ago when I worked at Brunswick City Schools in Ohio. I helped a teenage student solve a problem with a school bully. The problem was resolved so quickly that the teens’ mother inspired me to help other children in the district. Since I was already in the seminar business, I eventually began speaking to large and small groups of young people in classrooms, auditoriums, assemblies, and school cafeterias.
Although I deal with various topics such as: goal setting, memory and concentration, stress management, avoiding drugs and alcohol and designing your future; I am convinced that the most important factor in inspiring greatness in our youth is building their self-esteem. Therefore, self-esteem is a common thread that works perfectly in all of our programs.
Did you know that approximately 1/3 of the victims of violent crimes are between the ages of 12 and 19? Approximately 2,800 teens in the United States become pregnant every day, 1 in 3 high school students will not graduate, and more than 3,000 teens start smoking every day. Our children can easily fall victim to these behaviors and become a statistic due to a lack of self-esteem. Your child’s self-esteem is the key to avoiding peer pressure, drugs, alcohol, and other dangerous and self-destructive activities. They use these tough behaviors to distract themselves from the problems they are facing at home or at school.
I am convinced that the most destructive type of mind is the mind that feels worthless and worthless. By increasing the self-esteem of their youth, they become masters of their destiny. Then they can easily abolish self-doubt, overcome fears and anxieties, overcome defeatist attitude, and win. This is the true path to greatness.
By high self-esteem I don’t mean an arrogant, self-centered, or narcissistic type of mentality. Instead, healthy self-esteem is demonstrated by realizing your own worth. Understand your own uniqueness and the contributions you can make to our world. Realize that of the 80 billion people who have ever walked the Earth, there was never anyone like you and there never will be. A healthy form of self-esteem is to realize that you are perfect just the way you are. You are comfortable with yourself, your beliefs and values. You hold yourself in high esteem, but you maintain a quiet humility and an aura of serenity. These are the common denominators that our children must acquire to achieve greatness.
High self-esteem is the key to better grades, better social skills, greater self-confidence, and higher-quality friends. (Remember: a great way to gauge your child’s self-esteem is to look at the friends he hangs out with and the boyfriends or girlfriends he has.)
We must constantly remind our children that we can never rise higher than the image we have of ourselves. If our self-image is negative, we will never reach our peak and be everything we could have been. However, if the image you have of yourself is positive, we can rise up and know our greatness. We can discover who we really are, avoid psychosclerosis (hardening of the mind), and leave a magnificent legacy. With high self-esteem your future is unlimited.
Here are some powerful exercises you can do at home with your kids to help fuel their greatness. These are great strategies that I use with my own children and they seem to produce good results.
1. On a piece of paper, ask your child to write down all of his good points, positive traits, and the things he admires most about himself. Spend as much time as possible on this. You will be surprised at how many admirable qualities you possess and can be appreciated by others.
2. Teach your child to become a “good seeker.” Always catch yourself in the act of doing something good. You can easily increase your value by focusing on the positive feedback you give yourself. Constantly focus on his strengths and see his shortcomings as reminders that there is still work to be done. Remember, you are not your weaknesses. You are a positive individual with enough personal power to recognize a deficiency and turn it into a strength. Teach your child to pat himself on the back frequently, he deserves it much more than he thinks.
3. Work with your child to constantly challenge the ideas he has about himself. Teach them to challenge his critical inner voice. They are in charge, so they must take control. If a disempowering image ever pops into your mind, ask yourself, “Is this image accurate, or do I need to update my mental resume?” “Am I stuck with this image or can I change it?” The moment you start asking these questions, you gain control and empower yourself to change. If you hear your inner voice criticizing you, remember that you can always have the last word. Do everything you can to prove the internal critic wrong. Use your voice as a signal to move on and achieve freedom. You disarm the inner critic every time you prove him wrong. As your son continues to respond in this way, the voice will gradually disappear and he will realize that he has found his match.
I will close with a powerful story:
One day a farmer was walking through his field and came across a small glass jar in his tomato garden. Out of curiosity, he slipped a small tomato down the neck of the jar, careful not to break the vine. He placed his little experiment on the ground and then left it alone. At harvest time, the farmer was working on a row of large, ripe tomatoes when he came across the old glass jar. This time it looked very different and strange. Upon examining it, he soon discovered that the small tomato he had stuffed inside of him had now completely filled his crystal prison. Having no more space, he had simply stopped growing. The farmer broke the jar and held in his hand a small, misshapen and distorted tomato. It was less than half the size of the other tomatoes and exactly the shape of the jar.
Even though our youth may not be tomatoes, their self-esteem could be something like that jar. It plays a role in determining the size and type of person they become. We can enlarge our self-imposed limitations by breaking our glass prisons and increasing our self-esteem. The path to greatness lies outside the jar.
I wish you luck and success!